Ordering Hooked on Phonics, Adult Version

I sprained my back. That means a few weeks of recovery for me and a few weeks of catering to the family's basic needs for B.O.B. and led, in part, to the following exchange at Chez Funk this evening.

Me: Where did you get this toilet paper?
B.O.B.: I thought it was a nice gesture on my part to get it.
Me: My question was 'where did you get it?' (Having a sprained back has made me bit more short-tempered than usual).
B.O.B: It's Cottonelle, a name you can trust.
Me: It's not Cottonelle, it's Softielle.
B.O.B.: Oh.
Me: Do you know what Softielle means in French? SANDPAPER!

On the bright side, I won't need to schedule a Brazilian wax thanks to Softielle.